Just been reading about the fiasco caused by Tesco this morning when they released their delivery slots!
It saves me a fortune doing it online because I only buy what I need as opposed to the junk I put in my trolley when I go to the store!
I don't like shopping and l find l have saved money by shopping on line l meal plan for two weeks and only buy what l need,..been doing it for a few years now works for me..
I've pinched this, but it's fab!!
Just in case anyone is stressing about Christmas Day........!
Here's my top tip
I have concluded that the inevitable stress of Christmas dinner is
created by adverts, supermarkets and TV chefs…
It's a Sunday dinner for goodness sake!!!
The only difference is that you are allowed to open a bottle of wine
before you open the kitchen curtains.
We do it quite happily 51 weeks of the year but can we the
consumers be trusted to manage by ourselves on one day of the
1. Turkey...It's a big fecking chicken that's all, 20 minutes per lb plus 20
minutes at 180 degrees - jobs a good un! Get yourselves a meat
thermometer £3 off the Internet poke it in the offending bird if it says
75 degrees or over its cooked!
2. Stuffing - regardless of what Jamie Oliver says you do NOT need
2lbs of shoulder of pork, onions breadcrumbs, pine nuts and a shit load
of fresh herbs to make stuffing...( no fecking wonder he's bankrupt if
thats what he spends to make stuffing!)
What you need is Paxo and a kettle!! If you wanna liven it up squeeze 3
sausages out of their skins and mix that in with your Paxo before
3. Gravy - Jamie Oliver is copping for this one aswell….
Bisto Jamie... All you need is Bisto!
I ( nor anyone else I know) has got time on Christmas Eve to piss about
roasting chicken wings and vegetables, adding stock and flour,cooking
it for another half hour, mashing it all up with a potato masher and then
straining the whole sorry mess to make gravy
4. Vegetables...Never mind faffing round shredding sprouts and
frying them with bacon and chestnuts to make them more palatable..
you don't like them don't buy and cook the fecking things!! If your
family only eats frozen peas then that's good enough!
5. Roast potatoes…… Yes I par boil mine then roast them in goose fat bu
Aunt Bessie also does the same .
6. Trimmings /Christmas pudding and the like……. Aldi or Lidl!
(oh and while we're on the subject of pudding- if birds custard is wha
your family likes on the wretched thing then that's fine - you do not
need brandy butter /rum sauce etc or anything else that costs a feckil
fortune and takes 2 hours to make!)
Children.. Feed the little blighters first separately, if they only want
turkey with tomato sauce - fine leave em to it, it doesn't matter. Onct
they are fed bugger them off to play with their Christmas presents si
that YOU can enjoy your dinner in Peace!
Adults... Anyone that can manage to get their sorry arse to your dinner
table is also capable of helping to serve up/ sort the kids out/ clear the
table /wash up /dry up etc.
NO ONE.... And I mean no one APART FROM THE COOK IS ALLOW
TO GET PISSED AND FALL ASLEEP BEFORE THE WASHING UP IS
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