Any tips on keeping a scared 5 nearly 6 year old in their own bed?

[Guest]

I am constantly doing the reassuring and settling back in his own bed but he's genuinely scared.

Bless him tonight he asked me if being not to be scared is something you learn or if it happens when you grow up?

Hes scared of things like poppy playtime but has never been allowed to play unsuitable games.

[Fleur]

My only suggestion is to cosleep alongside your reassurance. It's not for everyone.

We expect kids to sleep alone yet a lot of adults don't like it.

[Sally]

We've always co-slept until they were ready, but the game changer for my autistic 11yr old who wanted to sleep in his own room but felt he couldn't was a 2-way chat baby monitor, so he can talk to me if there's a problem, but if he's anxious we can just chat until he settles. I wish I'd done it years ago!!! He loves it and so do we!

[Lindsey]

He is so small still. Maybe cosleeping isn't for you, but I always think it's odd that adults expect children to sleep alone when the world is still all new and they have so much to learn and adults themselves don't tend to sleep alone. I think if you don't want to co sleep you just need to continue what you are doing.

[Kay]

Unpopular opinion here - are you able to just leave him until he's old enough to go " yeh I want my own bed, I need more space"?

[Ange]

I once read about a little boy who was scared of monsters under the bed, the mother took her little boy to the doctors and he did a prescription. Long story short but when they went to collect the prescription it was tap water in a bottle that they sprayed under the bed at night to scared away the monsters.

[Louise]

I'm the wrong person to ask if you want a magic solution, my answer is to snuggle with them and enjoy a good night's sleep. They are only little once and body contact increases oxytocin which in turn makes you and your child feel happy and safe. We all feel safer sleeping next to someone, it's primal instinct. Honestly, we sleep deeper and longer when I bedshare with my daughter. Also talk to your child about their fears and what's the worst they think can happen/what can they do in that situation to give them some power over it. Leave a light on if that's what they need.

[Helen]

My son used to have a worry monster we would sit and write his worries down before bed and zip them in the monsters mouth then take them out later when asleep and when he woke up the monster would eat all his worries away. We did it for a long time but eventually we didn't need it anymore.

[Vi Vi]

What is scary for him exactly? Mine was worried about monsters so we tickled them and the hate being happy and laugh so the ran away. He was worry about shadows so we did shadow play, made different animals and shapes, also checked where the shadows come (clothes, furnitures etc) and moved some of them or put google eyes on the wall on the shadows. If it's a more serious reason like death, which is common in that age, just talk about it naturally and make sure your child has an answer. Mine asked where will he live if i die. I asked him where he would want to live and was no surprise, named the person who will have him if it happens. He is okay with it, doesn't worry what will happen to him etc and still talking about it as a natural thing to die one day when randomly brings up the subject for a reason.