Any nice ideas for activities for children to do with a grandparent with terminal cancer to keep as a keepsake?

[Guest]

Sad topic | Please can anyone give me any nice ideas for activities for children to do with a grandparent with terminal cancer to keep as a keepsake?

Also, for those who have been through something similar is there anything you wish you had done with the grandparent to help your children to prepare?

Thank you, I really appreciate any advice.

[Christine]

Lots of photos and videos so they can hear their voice when they want to.

[Kim]

Hi there. My dad has terminal cancer and my children have always been a part of his journey. We got in touch with macmillan who were Incredible. They gave us books and stories for us to read with them to prepare for every stage. They also gave us a book, which they have written questions for dad to answer I.e what's your favourite memory with me (the kids) for them to fill our together and then it becomes a keepsake.

There are loads of ways we have gotten the kids involved, such as planting a memory tree which they can add ornament too and notes on birthdays etc when the time comes.

If I were to recommend any book it would be "the invisible string" which includes a lifelong story of lobe between people.

I really wish you and your family all the best as you go through this ordeal

[Nicky]

Handprint pictures. Video story times together. Cupcake decorating together. Building Lego together or simple craftwork.

[Jen]

Having just lost my dad all I wanted was a handprint in clay that I could place my hand in/on not a 3d casting one just a plain flat one, to be able to still place my hand on his. we lost him suddenly and it was hard to get a deep imprint so whatever you want doing please do it as soon as you can because one day soon it will be too late.

We have pictures and sone videos of him with us and grandkids but nowhere near enough there will never be enough. Get them to record a personal mesage for the kids on your phone so they remember their vouce their expression and the love on their facec when they say their granchildrens name. All the things I wish we had time to do because these are things you can never get back.

Sending you love and strength x

[Alisha]

Please get voice messages of them! Just a simple ‘hi I hope you’re ok, I love you’, it’s so nice to hear there voices after, I’ve got many voicemails from my Nan just to hear her voice x

[Karen]

Yeah, I'd make videos. It's the one thing I wish I had more of. I can hear my mum's voice in them but can't see her in most of them. I found my 12-year-old daughter watching a video of her with her gran when she was 1 where they were singing together.

[Jo Vale]

My daughter and her nanny used to bake together all the time…I wish we’d sat and wrote all their recipes down together.

We didn’t force anything they just spent time being them. I knew when the end was very close…I spoke age appropriately to my daughter so she knew what was happening and we planned their goodbye… said what they needed to say. That has helped her so much. They said goodbye on the Sunday and we lost her on Wednesday. I’m so sorry you are going through this, macmillan have resources and support for children as well xx

[Anna]

We are going through this now and have been very honest with my little girl as she is very close to my dad (at the advice of the McMillan nurses) She is aware grandad will not get better and very much part of this journey.

My dad has already gave both my daughter and my niece a necklace and a letter for them to keep.

They do things together when he is well enough. Photos - I take lots of photos (even when they are not aware I’m doing so)

She’s actually coping really well and her understanding of what will happen is really good for 6 years old. She has also seen me cry and knows it’s ok to feel sad x

[Stacey]

Depends on the age of the child. My daughter was 3 when her grandmother died and it was also during lockdown. She was in a home but due to her condition deteriorating (but not too bad so as to upset my daughter) we made bracelets from a bead set my daughter had.

One for each of them. We did a window visit. The care assistant put it on grandma for my daughter to see. My daughter keeps her one treasured.

She is almost 7 now and talks frequently about grandma having the bracelet she made her in heaven. She finds it a comfort that they have one each xx

[Sarah]

Give your children the choice as to whether to see the relative when the end is near, and also with regard to saying goodbye, mine were only young but it helped them cope.

Simple activities, picnic in the garden, ice cream farm, the things you would normally do, with lots of photos - more meaningful than big one off experiences

[Sian]

When my grandma passed away, my son bought her a build a bear that once she passed away was left too him! It now sits proudly on his bookcase along with a scarf of hers she used to wear! Not so much an activity as such.

We also drew around her hand and his hand put his hand print on top of hers and framed it! And made up a photo album of pictures of her and him through the years that he can go too when he's missing her.

I also got a blanket made on free prints with pictures of her and my mum. That I gifted to my mum x

[Dani]

I wish I had done more videos on my phone of them together. Also we have a yoto, I wish I had recorded my mum reading a few stories for my child to listen to on their yoto.